Facebook after Ferguson aka How to read a rainbow: A masterclass by @SistaTV

Even though many of you will never believe me because I write stuff like this and this…. Ya girl, SistaTV, is all about that peace, bout that peace, NO RUCKUS.

I am mother of 3 who just left her husband, abruptly had to sell her no longer forever house, and moved to the blissfully boring burbs of my beloved Chicago. I hate to once again trot out the hackneyed but ever appropriate #sweetbrown but Trust me, I spend way too much of my precious time busting my butt to make ends hope to meet to invest any of this my most precious commodity properly busting any of your completely deserving sexist, classist, or racist chops.

Even still, I have spent many a very long, trying day after something explodes into the news cycle sweating over words typed fervently in a Facebook comment box,  filling them with just proper ratio of snark, actual fact checking, and Google Phd realness.  Like many you brave e-activist souls, I’ve heroically posted many a status on Facebook or the interwebs to dismantle the so so many dreadfully long, the lord is testing me ignorant, soul burningly ill informed Blogs, Blog comments, Facebook statuses, tweets and social media drivel that we are all now so familiar with…

So my brothers and sisters in the” Lord, how many more of these donkeys will I have to unfriend today?” struggle, I would like to share with you a revelation that came to me like a light unto the Lord as so many of my “friends” continued to post stories from clearly reputable top news sources that have actual misspelling in their domain names and end in the very respectable .info. I can’t tell you how many blocks I’ve blocked over repostings of urgent warnings of dog meat at Chipotle, Airborne Ebola, and  the C-O-N-Spiracy that has been carried out against Bill Cosby, Woody Allen, Chris Brown, Noam Chomsky by Obamacare, the musical stylings of Beyonce, and Kim Kardashian’s illuminati.

The special secret is NO ONE. Not one person ever transforms from David Duke to Dalai Lama in their social media life or IRLife because of any of our eloquent ability to go blow for blow with them in these real AF e-beef streets.

I know it hurts to realize all of your valiant Disqus efforts were for naught but it never works. It doesn’t matter how much you point out their denial or post actual facts to derail their blissful ignorance. Those who are committed to misunderstanding will misunderstand.

Now both you and I know that SistaTV is indeed the most special kind of blessing to all who are blessed to be in my social media presence, I have realized that people who deny, derail, or are obviously competing to be Charlemagne’s Donkey of the Day are NOT MY MINISTRY. I believe God loves a cheerful giver, so I obediently give them with a very generous love offering from the my ever growing BLOCKEDT ministry, and then happily leave them to stay blessed and blissed out in their willful ignorance.

I was doing alright but last night as the grand jury decision came down something in my soul cried out.  Do not ask me why but seeing the pimple… I mean Bruise on Darren Wilson’s face reminded me of the many HEELARIOUS stories my soon to be ex would regale us with about the countless COMPLETELY illegal acts that him and his brothers had perpetrated as rowdy young men all around the windy city.

I swear this is no shade at all to my soon to be ex- husband or his bros. I am eternally grateful to God, that he was able to grow up to become the man that I mistakenly chose to have three wonderful children and one extremely terrible relationship with, in spite those law breaking ways. I know that’s funny but I’m serious about that because if weathering the storm of having my heart and life shattered by him was necessary to for me to become the mother of the three glorious people that call me mommy….I count it ALL joy.

Its just that I am also well aware that the two biracial sons that we are blessed to be the co-parents of can never ever participate in ANY of those kind of no consequence wacky hijinks like their white forefathers and white father before them  because 1. I believe that illegalactivity of any kind at any age is unacceptable and 2. NO. Just NO and because of my own personal favorite 3.  LOL MELANIN.

Last week, when a STATE OF EMERGENCY was declared on a random regular ass day when absolutely NOTHING was happening in AT ALL in  fear-mongering anticipation of the possible outcome of this totally unbiased, completely lawful, and obviously judicially correct grand jury investigation of the events leading up to the death of Michael Brown, I wanted to say something.

I didn’t say much, for a lot of reasons but because Jesse Williams and I have been appointed the varsity Co-Captains of team tell the truth and shame the devil, I believe its important that I point out my own donkey.   The truth is one of the reasons why I hate to fight with these dummies about this situation in Ferguson is because sometimes I have stupidly wished Michael Brown was more Rosa Parks than Claudette Colvin.

I hate that he stole them cigarillos. I hate it. hate it. HATE IT.  Maybe you don’t want to admit it but sometimes you do too because even though it 1000% should not matter and in no way justifies a flurry of 12 gun shots. It has given denial donkeys something to comfort themselves with as they curl up in their well worn extremely comfortably racially weighted blanket of he was no angel. Mostly every single person of color understands that in order to even be seen as 3/5 of human being you can never give even the most hateful devil a reason to say you were “no angel”.

After years of the ridiculous and heart breaking shame that fills every black person when “the alleged perpetrator is described as black”,  even we start to believe every house negro’s favorite cry of “don’t start none, won’t be none.”  And while in most situations in life that is applicable, please take heed and KNOW that all too often black and brown men and women have done none and been wrongfully executed and imprisoned by some.

The fact is none of us actually know what transpired that day. But If you know what is good for your  bruise free face you will get your entire life and understand that while criminal activity of any kind is deserving of just punishment, the time of 12 bullet immediate firing squad does not fit the crime of UNarmed robbery and allegedly resisting arrest. Especially when several “no angels” have been able murder innocent schoolchildren and shoot up an entire movie theater full of folks without their bullet ridden body being left in the middle of the street for four hours.

If after all of that, you are still wrestling with the imaginary demon of what kind of person Michael Brown SHOULD have been, I encourage you to refrain from shooting it 6 times but to please PROMPTLY instruct the respectable post racial negro or the diet racist deep down inside of you to have a sharp tack filled seat in the back of the express bus to Fruitvale Station.  That line does offer stops, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, AND any of the 100 of other stops that  shockingly dependably could make every 28 hours all around America.

But what I realize is Michael Browns, Darren Wilsons, and SistaTVs are products of  the worlds and enviorments we have lived and been nurtured in. Some of us turn out good, some of us turn out bad, all of us have a bit of both, and none of us experience our world the same.  And because I understand that, I for one am sick and tired of being sick and tired of the extremely uncomfortable world that I must raise my children to never ever make any mistakes.

My boys are six and my daughter is eight. Soon I will have to hold their hands and carry  them over the great racial divide between them, their white friends, and the colorfully narrow line between careful and carefree.

So I’m hopeful you can imagine the level of my discontent when I found a few of my “friends” ruefully expressing how deeply affected they were by the trouble in Ferguson.

First there was this gem from a former associate…  She edited out some of the more offensive stuff that I saw before I  screenshot but I did not want her to spend her evening “ shaking her head…. for real…” while grappling with unanswered questions for the peaceful solidarity protestors in Chicago and of “why here?”   I mean she was going to have to call off work or deal with an extended commute because of these civilly disobedient “idiots” and “LOL” don’t they have jobs? Why should she be faced to ponder these questions alone?

So I answered her:

 

Screen Shot 2014-11-25 at 7Above all else God loves a cheerful giver.

But when another woman whose multiple posts filled with comments about “THEY” and detailing how she was “personally affected” by the tension after Ferguson posted this…Screen Shot 2014-11-25 at 4
And she and her friends responded with this:

Screen Shot 2014-11-25 at 3

I couldn’t take it anymore. I decided that the best way deal with Facebook after Ferguson was to read these idiots for filth and make them too uncomfortable to ever share their nonsense with me again. No matter what your take on this matter, I am pleading with you to block me right now because if I catch you out here obtusely commenting on something so terrible as an entire city in a uproar, an 18 year old man shot dead in the street, and a mother who will never see her son again, you better check thine self before you wreck thineself.

She courageously deleted my original comment but I’m hopeful that by sharing an even more reading rainbow razor sharp version of my original comment to her here, you can all support me and make this article go viral so she will be forced to live all her social media days under the very” ON PURPOSE” tension of knowing that thousands of people all over the internets know of her complete ignorance and are gleefully having quite the riot while laughing at her pain. #letsgo

Senam SistaTV Amegashie:

Please note: On innumerable days, in innumerable situations, over innumerable years, I, and many others who are very similar to the PEOPLE you have in several posts chosen to call “animals” who are making “themselves look bad” and so “terribly uneducated” have to deal with “on purpose tension” and so much more than the horrific slights that you claimed to  have experienced for the first time TODAY.

While I don’t know the thinking behind every “rioter” or person you’ve come in contact with who have so deeply scarred you to have lead you to stray from “keeping it silly”and post this very long, very impassioned plea for understanding because a “black girl” stole your gym machine while you were not on it, with your back turned to it, and drinking your Powerade.

First I want you to know, I share in your love of the thirst quenching deliciousness of ice cold White cherry Powerade and secondly when did you switch gyms? Because the one that I’ve seen you post your numerous duck-lipped workout selfies from does not allow members under the age of 18. I’d like you to look into reporting the fact that an obviously underage person you identified as a “girl” child was allowed to freely encroach on your Queen Beyonce level “grown woman” style and use of your separate but equally shared gym equipment.  That’s neither here nor there because above all else, I want you to know…. I stand with you.

Also, I’d like to extend my sincerest condolences, because you were within 12 earshots when two post office workers had a conversation about one of them having “to tell her black son that she didn’t feel it was safe for him to go outside anymore.” I understand it made you uncomfortable because “all you wanted to do was send your package” in peace.

I BEG, WHO AMONGST US will be brave enough to stand up and demand the undeniable need for unwavering professionalism from the Polic- I mean, Post office. I’m sickened by the thought that you may have found yourself caught in the crossfire of unchecked public servants who have been tasked to post and serve this great nation. Oh, the struggles you have known. Please, accept my deepest sympathies on your loss and I’m hopeful you will recover from your suffering.

Beloved, you and I agree that criminal activity of any kind is completely reprehensible, so please link me to your equally lengthy, impassioned, damning, dehumanizing, and shaming posts that you made chastising the terribly educated students that who rioted, flipped cars, attacked police, looted businesses, and burned stuff because someone was fired for protecting a known serial child molester and that one time, when a festival ran out of pumpkins. Coincidentally, “THEY” are very similar to you and I look forward to experiencing the glorious prose and the righteous indignation I’m sure you had as a much needed “new leader” for your people. Fix their lives, sis, Fix their lives.

Tragically, not everyone has been afforded the blessed opportunity to become a “grown woman” like you have called yourself, while patting yourself on the back for remaining calm and not rioting over the injustices of your day.

Luckily,  I am also a grown woman, with a whole lot of style and a just touch of amazing grace, so I have and will continue to remain calm despite often finding myself just as “infuriated” as you have found yourself today. You stay blessed and never forget that SistaTV loves you!

Because I’m happy.

Caption: This is a picture of me gleefully laughing after snatching you edgeless while instructing you to your seat in the @sistatv read me and my rainbow for FILTH section. Good day.

There are numerous reasons why I needed to read her this intensely bright rainbow but the one that hurts me the most is that I am 100% certain that I am one of the many friends of color that she is passionately claiming to love because of who they really are.  But who I am really am is one of her former black friends who has respectably, politely, and gently pointed out her continued microaggressions towards and fetishizing of people of color while forgiving her for her “ I didn’t even realize” lies and believing her feigned contrition.  I am hopeful that after reading my words and you all helping it to become unavoidably viral, she any other of her obliviously, small-minded moronic counterparts will find the strength, courage, and wisdom to never include me or any of you in her literal or figurative friends list again.

SistaTV loves you.

Senam SistaTV Amegashie spends most of her time waiting for someone to give her a TV show, already! While waiting for that to happen you can find her sporadically blogging her life  and solving all 99 of your Problems with her advice column at SistaTV.com, screencapping rap quotes and motivational posters @sistaTv on Instagram, selling witty Tshirts, and making SistaTV YouTube videos.

SistaTV loves you!

 

2 Responses to “Facebook after Ferguson aka How to read a rainbow: A masterclass by @SistaTV”

  1. Curvy CEO says:

    I love you girl! So, it came to my attention after the fact that a friend of a friend was offended by something I posted about Ferguson…she felt that I was somehow implying that only black people are allowed to have an opinion about the situation (which is not at all what I said). But it’s such a tense time that everyone is very sensitive and emotions are running high….thanks for posting this!

    • SistaTV says:

      I love you too!!! Thank you for this comment… I’m going to work on adding a postscript to clarify that I obviously we want people of various races and viewpoints to comment and discuss what is happening. My issue is that a lot of it is so devoid of any real self reflection or empathy for those of us who are truly hurt by this situation.

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48 days to 2015… New Year’s Resolutions in the Old Year

I don’t know why but this morning it occurred to me that there are less than 50 days until New Years Day 2015 and New Year’s Resolutions. I love every singly thing about New Year’s and New Year’s Resolutions. Every year I set my New Year’s Resolutions so carefully. So Earnestly. And every year I set the same New Year’s Resolutions again because I have zero point zero idea how to Keep New Year’s Resolutions through the whole year.

So this morning when I realized how close we were to the New Year…. I wasn’t ready . I really feel like New Year’s Day 2014 was two seconds ago.

2014 was a bit of a blur for me. If I hadn’t lived it myself, I wouldn’t even be sure if this last year was even real. It was a doozy but I’m grateful for it all.

I have no idea where 2015 will take me, but I know without a doubt that next year will be even bigger and better.

But I’m not exactly sure how. I spent most of this year in awe of what God can do. In a lot of ways, I was sort of a spectator to the show God put on in my life. He really showed up and showed out. Last year, I truly didn’t understand faith and the goodness of God. This year… I totally get it. So, now that I know what he can do, I feel like he’s telling me its time to stop watching from the stands and stand up and let the world see what WE can do.  I’m ready to enlarge my faith, eliminate my fears, and work with God to fly even higher.

This scripture has been running through my mind a lot lately:

14 What does it profit, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can faith save him? James 2:14

What is my work? I have NO IDEA.

Can my faith alone save me? Yes, I believe so. But what would happen if I use faith and work in concert? Again…. I have NO IDEA.

What I know for sure is that today, I can start creating the habits that will allow me to do the work to have a year of never before. I’m going to start my new year’s resolutions in the old year. I’m not waiting till midnight on the 1st of January. I’m going to start working now.

I need to set some goals for myself and actually achieve them.

I believe that goal setting, consistency, and elimination need for perfection are the keys to success…

Why? Because I don’t do any of these things, and I have yet to hold on to any lasting success. I’m being hard on myself but I want more. And I’m hopeful that if I work on those three things and stay centered in my faith in God, I will find myself celebrating long-term lasting successes in all areas of my life

In 2014, I got a my testimony. Now I’m going to work on the message.

I’m going to give myself a 48 days 14 hours 57 minutes and 27 seconds head start on my New Year’s Resolutions. I will set the foundations for my success habits now, so when the bell tolls on 2015, I’ll be ready.

So those are my three things:

Goal Setting.

Consistency.

Understanding that Perfection is the enemy of Done.

Get My Goals Done Consistently.

SistaTV Loves you, Self Reflection, and Realizing New Year’s Resolutions can begin on any given Thursday.

Happy New Year, loves.

 

 

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I’m a Very Kinky Girl Shirts on Sale NOW!!!

Hey hey hey loves,

Shirt on sale for only 4 more hours!! http://www.teespring.com/kinky!

 

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SistaTV and the Thinkings…. May 18th, 2014…

1. Couch to 5k is a Jam. Like fo’ reals…

2. I am certain someone at the gym is going to be filing a complaint against me because they  thinking I’m lewdly staring at them in the gym locker rooms.

Why?

Because I realize I have absolutely ZERO point ZERO idea what exactly I’m supposed to pack in my gym bag and what I’m supposed to take with me into the shower, or do in front of my locker, or do in front of the mirror or basically anything. So I find myself trying to sneak glances at peoples gym and makeup bags at the gym and trying to watch their routines to figure out how to do this shit right…. Writing that made me realize this is a perfectionist thing and I’ve got to just do some trial and error and figure out what works and doesn’t work for me… Just pack a bag and go! Now watch me go and spend 45 minutes researching 78809582901 gym and makeup bag options.

3. In my life, I’ve made some really bad choices about the people I’ve let in my life. I forgive myself for allowing these people into my lives. And I give myself permission to change my mind about keeping them in my life. The end.

4. I haven’t bought myself smell goods in almost 2 years. So now I’m currently obsessed with figuring out my perfect bath gel/perfume/body splash/ lotion combo… I know I want it to be fruity, tropically and I’m forcing myself to make some decisions this week and buy these things for myself. Yes, money is tight. But No, I will no longer deny myself simple pleasures like smelling like a delicious coconut, chocolate, pineapple, banana, bowl of deliciousness. If I live a life where spending a little bit of money of thing that make me feel good about me is impossible then its not a life worth living.

5. I love my kids.

6. My scale is off cause one of the little floor balancing things came off so now it gives me a different reading every time. I wish there were words for how frustrated this is making me. But alas there are not. But there is (will be) another $20 to buy myself another digital scale that is is reliable…

7. Beyonce and Kanye might be single handedly responsible for keep my butt in the gym and at this whole running thing.

8. Period tracker apps are from Jesus. I use the My Days ( or is it My Calendar) app and it has been absolutely invaluable to me… Learning my body is completely revelatory.

9. Now that I’ve divested from spending all my time completely wrapped up in the life, the abuse, and the lies of certain people, I’m amazed at all the things I was neglecting to do for and notice about myself. Like for real… Letting some folks go is all I needed to finally grab hold of and take ownership of myself…. And it feels good. For this I am grateful.

10. Women love hard as hell.

11. My heart is tired. I’m trying to help her. Its working. I think.

12. The library is still my favorite home.

13.

14. I still think the number thirteen is unlucky… For why? I have no idea.

15. I slept for 0:57 minutes last nite. 57 minutes… And I’m not even tired but like WTF?

16. I’m an excellent cook. Even this healthy shit I’ve been cooking is the BOMB. I have to remind myself that just because its healthy/low fat/ low cal/ high protein/etc it doesn’t mean I can go hot ass mess and just eat 8 servings in one sittings…. Where dey do that at?

17. Men hit on me… often. I like it but I run away from it… Often. But sometimes… I don’t.

18.

I can see clearly now the rain is gone.
I can see all obstacles in my way.
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It’s going to be a bright, bright bright sunshiny day.

19. Good night.

20. SistaTV Loves you. Now you love you and treat yourself like it.

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Say Something, I’m giving up on me…Or Nah? SistaTV & the 5k

You might be surprised by what I’m about to say. But sometimes I don’t want to say shat. This may come as surprise since my life dream is to have my own TALK show.  But there is one thing I go out of my way to keep my mouth shut about.

I don’t like telling people what I’m going to do because when I tell people what I’m going to do, I don’t do it.

Like literally sometimes the minute, “I’m going to do XYZ”, comes tumbling out of my mouth, any intention to do what I just said I was going to do IMMEDIATELY leaves my body.

Here is a re-enactment:

I have so much guilt, anxiety, and drama attached to all the things I wanted to do, said I was going to do, and didn’t. Most of the time this is a symptom of my Perfectionism and that leads to me not doing anything at all.

I’ve always been baffled by how much telling people my goals has worked against me. I heard a TED talk about this once that something about telling people you are going to do something is almost as satisfying as doing the actual thing. And I read something in a book, about how you can immediately internalize the negative things people say about your goals and fail before you’ve even started.

Because of all this…  I decided that the very best thing I could do was shut my mouth about my intentions.

I put it into practice for some things in my life and I found that I really, really, really, like just shutting my freaking mouth.

Most huge things that have happened to me have come from me choosing to or having to shut the freak up about it. I just shut my mouth and get it done.

So when early last Saturday I decided to do this…

registrationI just figured I’d keep my mouth shut for the next 100 or so days and then post some pictures of me at the finish line in August and be done with it.

Can I just take a moment to say that typing about it here and knowing that you are reading about it this very moment is already giving me a vision of me sitting on a couch, full of fail, on the day of the Graffiti run wondering,  “Why the f**k didn’t I do what I said I was going to do?” Like if there was a panic attack thermometer I am certain I would be well off the charts.

But the thing is, I did something else.

Screen Shot 2014-04-26 at 3.23.24 PM What if I perhaps, signed up to create a team for a 5k in a hundred days?

So about that keeping your mouth shut thing… What about when its the kind of thing that you actually want to share with other people? What if you want to run across the finish line with friends and family feeling like the conquerors we all are. Like is it fair to keep your mouth shut about something that you are doing that could be fun and really great to share?

I realize more than anything I’m scared to tell people who know me because I can’t take the comments from them. Like seriously, People on the internet who hate me or e-thug me don’t really bother me. I mean F your e-life but basically… WHATEV…

But I can’t take criticism from people I know. I have spent most of my life criticized for every single solitary freaking thing I’ve done (wrong or right). Seriously, I’ve LIVED with and LOVED people who spent most of our time together purposefully TROLLING me as if they lived under a bridge or were named Rumplestileskin. Like they wake up in the morning and say the most hateful, hurtful thing they could possibly say to me. There is one person in my life who I have never, EVER been in the same space as and not had them make some kind of negative comment about SOMETHING about me. Never. Ever. No lie. No joke. No exaggeration. Every single conversation with this person some how someway there is a moment about what is wrong with me AGAIN. On your wedding day? Yup? When you had your babies? YEP? You name it… They hated on it.

These people  when I would tell them I want to do something, they would IMMEDIATELY trout out all the reason why I’ll never do it, can’t do it,  why I’m too this, or too that and NO, NO, NO go sit your ass down somewhere.

For the most part, I don’t deal with these people anymore. Some of them I still have to cause…. such is life. I’m doing better with boundaries and frankly I’ve given up on having any kind of positive relationship with them. So I would NEVER talk to them about this. EVER. EVER. EVER.

But the interwebz is very public. And I’m writing about it on this here public blog that anybody can see. And one of their favorite pastimes is “seeing how I am doing?”  or ” Just giving me some advice, because they ‘love’ me! So I know that they will probably see this and try to shit on it in some way.  I know that they are probably reading this right now… Sidebar:recite-573--1614704758-zf46s5

Making that picture gave me so many lulz. But its not true. The truth is… This blog isn’t about them.

This blog, this run, this team, this whole life I’m living is about me. It took me 34 years to decided to live a life where I was the most important thing to me.

So it doesn’t matter who I tell or what they say, all that matters is what I do. So…

Screen Shot 2014-04-26 at 3.44.24 PMThese are my new shoes. At this very moment, we can’t even run 5 blocks… But In about 100 days we are going to be running our first 5k. Why? Because I said so. You should join us. CLICK HERE TO REGISTER For the Graffiti Run with SistaTV’s Conquer Mob Team

Use Coupon code: Easter50 to get 50% off!

SistaTV Loves you. Now you love you and treat yourself like it.

Website: http://www.sistatv.com
YouTube: http//www.youtube.com/sistatv
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